After much discussion Jake agreed to let me look for a job. He has never wanted me to work so I could focus on the home, and we would never have to adjust from going from a two income family to a one income family when children came into our lives. It has worked well until recently.
Buying your first home is exciting but all the things that go with it can be financially draining. We have always made money off the army when it comes to housing, now for the first time in 8+yrs we are having to put more money into housing than they are giving us. It became clear to me early on that I needed a job , but Jake took a lot of convincing.
We chose the little town of Elgin because it had the better school system in the area, and little crime- which is a huge issue in the city.
Issues I had to consider when thinking of employment were
-I have to small kids at home, I don't want someone else raising them!!
-Sitters cost money, so why work when I have to pay a sitter the majority of my wages
-We live 15+miles from the outskirts of the city (gas money, tolls, and time spent going into town. Round trip it costs me $6.75 to go into to town and 20-40minutes each way depending on which side of town I have to go to.)
-There are only two diners, a sub shop, a pizzeria, a grocery store, and two dollar store in Elgin
-The neighbour kids who could watch the kids until Jake got home get off the bus at 4pm
-Jake is home around 4:30ish ussually and leaves the house at 4:30am.
-I don't want to work Sundays (big shopping day here)
So my job options were limited. All I want is to work 10-15hrs a week to pay for the extras in life. While out on a date last week we dropped by a franchise in town advertising "Hiring". I went in early this week to talk to the manager and was hired on the spot and started three hours later. She asked me why I wanted to work there, I explained to her the hours work with raising my kids (4pm-10) and that it was close to home so I didn't have to drive more than 2miles to work.
SO here it is I work at PIZZA BIZ! A small pizzeria. It was kind of fun taking orders again, I also made dough, and cooked a few pizzas, nothing fantastic but it was good to feel like I was contributing to the family. I don't know exactly what my schedule will be like but most nights it will be just from 5-8pm. They are still trying to get me to work Sundays, but I just keep praying they will drop it, and give them to me. Everybody there does everything. Everybody takes turns driving, cooking, making dough, doing dishes, stocking shelves, etc.... For 10+hrs a week I think I will be able to handle this for a year until Jakes next pay raise. Plus I will finally be taught how to toss pizza dough like in the movies... :)
My Inner battles- I work at a pizza joint! I need to get on to a career type job- but I also need to just focus on my kids. I will continue to take classes. I am taking two classes this semester and hopefully will be able to work on CLEP-ing out off a few credits. I am working towards eventually having a day time job so in the years to come I can move on to something a little more reputable, when my kids are in school.
Jakes inner battles- I am working and he has to let me. He feels he has failed me in some small way because I have to work. In reality it is just what we have to do to make owning our home work for now.
Here's to my new job!
4 comments:
Chrissy, your mom made the same decision when you kids were small. You girls turned out all right and I don't think you were deprived of her influence in your lives.
Jake, you have not failed your family or wife in any way. There are times in a family when we all have to make decisions that we are not comfortable with. You both have the same goal and are working towards it. Chrissy is there as your help meet and support. If you remember what Pres Hinkley said at a YSA conference you both were at that there are times when your wife may have to work to reach that goal in the short term. Any move puts a stress on the family finances and the need for a second income in the interim until the extra pressure can be relieved can become a necessity. Be happy that Chrissy can do this and feel blessed that it can be done without putting a stress on the family and it gives her a feeling of accomplishment that she is contributing in a time of need. Don't deprive her of this. It was not a decision that was made lightly if I know my daughter.
Just remember not to become reliant on the extra income. Put it towards the goal and nothing else.
Love
Papa Hovan
you gotta do what you gotta do and this is only temporary and sounds kinda fun! plus, the most important thing is that you put your family first! i dont like the idea of anyone else raising amby too- thats why i do what i do for now. way to go!
I hope you aren't being too hard on yourself (Jake) you guys. I think you've done a great job figuring out how to make it so that those sweet kids of yours are home with a parent most of the time. You'll do great and you are making the best of it. Things will work out and hopefully when that raise comes for Jake you'll be able to stay home again. You are great parents.
Chrissy, Jake, I am so excited for you to have your house. I so know what you're going through right now. Having a job and not being with your children is really hard, because you feel you're not where you're supposed to be. But I'm a big believer that Heavenly Father will be there for you, Jake and the kids. They will be adjusting just fine and will understand, that sometimes decisions have to be made that we don't like, but are necessary. Jake, you have not failed your wife or family. The few times I've been around you guys in Logan and the pictures I see are just a true testimony of a happy family. Heavenly Father gave you this challenge, so you all can grow. I understand. I have to work 40 hours right now, so Michael can finish school, because I am not willing to let my family go under. But I know that soon it will change. So, like Chrissy said, when you get a raise, things may change. I know for sure that you guys are going to be alright and I hope, Chrissy, you will teach me how to toss pizza dough. love you guys. Sandra
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